Literally

Ever since the Internet got accessible easily, an Avant Garde descended from Linguistic Heaven to educate us, the stupid common people, literally point at our linguistically weak Achilles’ heel. Ouch, doesn’t the usage of “literally” sound wrong to you? Well, if you are a representative of today’s online patrol on misusage of the English language, you probably answer the previous question with a loud, stark Y-E-S. If your answer is no, please, don’t stop reading now. You already made it this far.

The blog I am presenting today (literally.barelyfitz.com) is particularly fun to read because of its tripple-layered content. It a, doesn’t just mock at mistakes, it also points out b, where the word “literally” is used correctly and c, where it is superfluous.

I picked the funniest quotes I could come across. They also feature comics, by the way.

Incorrect. Most fun errors.

Always in target are today’s presidential candidates. Here is a funny Hillary quote. Additional information that adds the spice: There were no deaths reported, in fact.

“We had 300 people outside, literally freezing to death.”

Unnecessary. Most obvious errors.

It looks like I am only picking on Democrats, but here’s what Senator Edwards said:

Tomorrow morning, 37 million of our own people will wake up literally worried about feeding and clothing their own children.

Our older son John Mark, our son David, his wife Lauren, our daughter Sarah, who’s literally lived in Iowa for the past 2 1/2 months.

Correct. Most educational errors.
#1: A correct use is quite seldom. To kick the bucket is an idiom for dying. A character in the movie “It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World” literally kicks a bucket when he dies (this time they really mean “literally”. See this post to fully comprehend (animated picture with the person dying and kicking the bucket)…

#2: Imagine a wedding ceremony. The vows are exchanged and the priest asks the bride, “Do you take this man, in sickness and in health, for better for worse, till death do you part?” - The woman says: “Well, I do. But not literally” - For me this is a correct usage that implies she is not fully committed.

If you not that much into reading blog entries (they are hilarious though), check out this short video on the 3 major misuses of “literally.”

Great video by Jack Danyells.

This video actually offers a suggestion for people who want to sound sophisticated when using “literally.” Next time you feel the urge, say figuratively. It’s 100% idiot-proof. He was literally about to explode. Figuratively is the cure for this. Trust us.

Your online patrolling Avant-Garde.